The late Art Buchwald wrote the following column to explain Thanksgiving to the French while he was a correspondent in France and it became an instant Thanksgiving tradition:
One of our most important holidays is Thanksgiving Day, known in France as le Jour de Merci Donnant.
Le Jour de Merci Donnant was first started by a group of Pilgrims (Pélerins) who fled from l’Angleterre before the McCarran Act to found a colony in the New World (le Nouveau Monde) where they could shoot Indians (les Peaux-Rouges) and eat turkey (dinde) to their hearts’ content.
They landed at a place called Plymouth (now a famous voiture Américaine) in a wooden sailing ship called the Mayflower (or Fleur de Mai) in 1620. But while the Pélerins were killing the dindes, the Peaux-Rouges were killing the Pelerins, and there were several hard winters ahead for both of them. The only way the Peaux-Rouges helped the Pelerins was when they taught them to grow corn (mais). The reason they did this was because they liked corn with their Pélerins.
In 1623, after another harsh year, the Pélerins’ crops were so good that they decided to have a celebration and give thanks because more mais was raised by the Pélerins than Pélerins were killed by Peaux-Rouges.
… is teh awesome. It’s a seasonal flavor that Safeway is carrying as one of its house brand ice creams. I put the chocolate fudge topping on it that turns into a hard shell and it is scrumptious.
This is the first year that Safeway has carried one of my favorite flavors of ice cream year-round: peppermint. I cannot explain to you why mint chocolate chip is not an acceptable substitute, although I like that, too. Anyway, I learned to love peppermint ice cream during my childhood in California. I began to look for it again as an adult and only found it at Safeway from Thanksgiving to New Year’s Eve. It would go on sale after Christmas and I would squirrel away as many half-gallons as my freezer would hold, and buy extra for my parents when they had a freezer. That way they had peppermint ice cream for a few more months.
I can live with Safeway’s pumpkin pie ice cream being a seasonal flavor, but the gingerbread cookie ice cream is so delicious that I hope they decide to make it year-round, like the peppermint ice cream.
So, if I understand this correctly, the current primary rationale against same-sex marriage equality is that the spouses involved cannot directly conceive children with one another, but straight people can marry ANYONE of the opposite sex, whether or not they intend to have children together, up to and including a person of the opposite sex who does not, as a practical matter, ACTUALLY EXIST?
Daniel Blatt, aka Gay Patriot West, saw Gov. Palin being interviewed this week and discussing her interview in 2008 with Katie Couric. Gov. Palin said that Couric never asked her any questions about her record in Alaskan government as a mayor, commissioner and governor. Instead, Couric badgered Gov. Palin by asking the same questions on trivial points again and again in an apparent effort to get responses that would show ignorance or irritation.
Not once did Couric manifest any knowledge of Palin’s record in Alaska, save the media scuttlebutt about her church and her views of social issue. But, that does not go to her record as a public official. Nothing about Palin’s work on the Alaska Oil and Gas Conservation Commission (AOGCC) where she took on a fellow Republican and ally of the Governor who had appointed her. Nothing about her work with a Democrat to bring down the corrrupt Republican Attorney General of her state. Nothing about the reforms she achieved as Governor by working across party lines.
Katie Couric, like many of her colleague in the mainstream media, ignored Sarah Palin’s record, perhaps to better portray as a clueless neophyte, chosen for her gender (so the GOP ticket could exploit divisions in the Democratic Party) and her “extreme” social views (so she could rally a dispirited GOP base).
It’s funny, they were as indifferent to Palin’s record in office as they were that of Barack Obama. By disregarding her record, they could dismiss her credentials as a real reformer, at odds with her party establishment. By turning a blind eye to this, they could portray him as a new kind of politician, ignoring that he had been a team player for the Chicago Democratic machine.
I do sincerely hope that the McCain/Palin campaign workers who muzzled Gov. Palin, then arranged for the interviews with Katie Couric and Charlie Gibson without showing up with their own camera crew to signal that editing the interviews into a hatchet job would be promptly exposed, find another line of work and never are employed in politics or public service again.
Margaret and I loved watching “Absolutely Fabulous” over and over. We saw its American debut, which included this music video of the Pet Shop Boys. I hoped it would be shown again in the reruns, but it never was, so this is the first time I’ve seen it, except from my own VHS recording, since it first aired. I happened to think of it today, and lo! it was on YouTube. Enjoy!
Lyrics:
Edina: Lights! Models! Guest list! Just do your best, darling.
Absolutely fabulous
We’re absolutely fabulous
Patsy: Darling, you are a fabulous, wonderful individual…
Edina: Oh, thank you, darling.
Patsy: …and remember; I’ve known you longer than your daughter ….
Edina: Champers all right for you, Pats?
Patsy: Lovely, sweetie.
Edina: Shall we finish off the beluga or shall we have
some smoked salmon and nibbly things?
Patsy: Oh, whatever, sweetie.
Edina: All right, we’ll finish off the beluga.
Patsy: Dull, soulless dance music.
Edina: Bip bip bip. Bop bop bop.
Patsy: Dull, soulless dance music.
Edina: Ride on time, ride on time. Techno, techno, bloody techno, darling!
Absolutely fabulous
Edina: That’s fabulous, darling.
we’re absolutely fabulous.
Patsy: That’s fabulous.
Edina: Good.
Edina: Chanel, Dior, Lagerfeld, Givenchy, Gaultier, darling. Names, names, names!
Harper’s, Tattler, English Vogue, American Vogue, French Vogue, bloody Aby-bloody-ssinian bloody Vogue, darling!
Lacroix, sweetie, Lacroix.
Lacroix, sweetie, Lacroix.
Sweetie! Sweetie! Sweetie! Sweetie!
Absolutely fabulous
Edina: Pump up the volume!
We’re absolutely fabulous
Edina: Just put the needle on the record.
Absolutely fabulous
Edina: Pump up the volume!
We’re absolutely fabulous
Edina: Are you ready for this, sweetie?
Edina: Ong, plong, kerplinky, plong. Ong, plong, kerplinky, plong. Ong,
plong, kerplinky, plong. I’m chanting as we speak, bye, bye, darling.
Ong, plong, kerplinky, plong. Ong, plong, kerplinky, plong. Ong, plong,
kerplinky, plong. Sweetie! Sweetie! Sweetie! Sweetie! Ong, plong, kerplinky,
plong. Ong, plong, kerplinky, plong. Ong, plong, kerplinky, plong.
I’m chanting as we speak, bye, bye, darling. Ong, plong, kerplinky,
plong. Ong, plong, kerplinky, plong. Ong, plong, kerplinky, plong.
Champers all right for you, Pats?
Patsy: Oh, he was just a windscreen washer I picked up at the traffic
lights. Bums so tight he was bouncing off the walls.
Edina: Bye, Pats. Lacroix, sweetie. Lacroix, sweetie. Lacroix, sweetie. La-La-La-Lacroix.
Absolutely fabulous
Edina: Let the music lift you up, darling!
We’re absolutely fabulous
Patsy: Dull, soulless dance music.
Absolutely fabulous
Edina: It’s the bloody Pet Shop Boys, Sweetie.
We’re absolutely fabulous
Edina: Are you ready for this, sweetie?
Edina: Ong, plong, kerplinky, plong. Ong, plong, kerplinky, plong.
Ong, plong, kerplinky, plong. I’m chanting as we speak, bye, bye,
darling. Ong, plong, kerplinky, plong. Ong, plong, kerplinky, plong.
Ong, plong, kerplinky, plong. Sweetie! Sweetie! Sweetie! Sweetie!
Patsy: It’s fabulous.
Edina: Good. Thank you.
Gay Patriot West, Daniel Blatt, and I share a love for the English novelist, Mary Anne Evans Cross, who wrote under the nom de plume, George Eliot. He has a lovely post today in honor of the 190th anniversary of her birth.
Eliot’s greatest novel, Middlemarch, is regarded as one of the best novels in English literature. It is a study of the interwoven lives of a fictional town, Middlemarch. When I first studied it in college it absolutely drove me crazy that the two main characters, Dorothea Brooke and Tertius Lydgate, who would have been perfect for one another and accomplished great things together, were not attracted to one another and chose spouses who ensured they would achieve nothing extraordinary. Odd, isn’t it, how when you get older you become more accepting of people’s lives not turning out how they planned in their youth.
My favorite passage in Middlemarch is in Chapter 15, where Eliot is describing how Lydgate developed his passion for medicine as a boy and his goals for his career — I have boldfaced the passages that I love the most:
Perhaps that was a more cheerful time for observers and theorizers than the present; we are apt to think it the finest era of the world when America was beginning to be discovered, when a bold sailor, even if he were wrecked, might alight on a new kingdom; and about 1829 the dark territories of Pathology were a fine America for a spirited young adventurer. Lydgate was ambitious above all to contribute towards enlarging the scientific, rational basis of his profession. The more he became interested in special questions of disease, such as the nature of fever or fevers, the more keenly he felt the need for that fundamental knowledge of structure which just at the beginning of the century had been illuminated by the brief and glorious career of Bichat, who died when he was only one-and-thirty, but, like another Alexander, left a realm large enough for many heirs. That great Frenchman first carried out the conception that living bodies, fundamentally considered, are not associations of organs which can be understood by studying them first apart, and then as it were federally; but must be regarded as consisting of certain primary webs or tissues, out of which the various organs – brain, heart, lungs, and so on-are compacted, as the various accommodations of a house are built up in various proportions of wood, iron, stone, brick, zinc, and the rest, each material having its peculiar composition and proportions. No man, one sees, can understand and estimate the entire structure or its parts — what are its frailties and what its repairs, without knowing the nature of the materials. And the conception wrought out by Bichat, with his detailed study of the different tissues, acted necessarily on medical questions as the turning of gas-light would act on a dim, oil-lit street, showing new connections and hitherto hidden facts of structure which must be taken into account in considering the symptoms of maladies and the action of medicaments. But results which depend on human conscience and intelligence work slowly, and now at the end of 1829, most medical practice was still strutting or shambling along the old paths, and there was still scientific work to be done which might have seemed to be a direct sequence of Bichat’s. This great seer did not go beyond the consideration of the tissues as ultimate facts in the living organism, marking the limit of anatomical analysis; but it was open to another mind to say, have not these structures some common basis from which they have all started, as your sarsnet, gauze, net, satin, and velvet from the raw cocoon? Here would be another light, as of oxy-hydrogen, showing the very grain of things, and revising all former explanations. Of this sequence to Bichat’s work, already vibrating along many currents of the European mind, Lydgate was enamoured; he longed to demonstrate the more intimate relations of living structure, and help to define men’s thought more accurately after the true order. The work had not yet been done, but only prepared for those who knew how to use the preparation. What was the primitive tissue? In that way Lydgate put the question-not quite in the way required by the awaiting answer; but such missing of the right word befalls many seekers. And he counted on quiet intervals to be watchfully seized, for taking up the threads of investigation — on many hints to be won from diligent application, not only of the scalpel, but of the microscope, which research had begun to use again with new enthusiasm of reliance. Such was Lydgate’s plan of his future: to do good small work for Middlemarch, and great work for the world.
By the way, if you ever hear an English major — and it really will only be an English major who would insult anyone this way — slam someone for pursuing the Key to All Mythologies, this is the book to read to understand the allusion.It will be worth the effort.
Update, 11/23/09, Mon.: Thank you, dear Little Miss Attila, for the link. My runner-ups are Anthony Trollope and Charles Dickens. Personally, I find Thomas Hardy too dark, although perhaps what he intended to do was rub Victorians’ noses in the dark side of their morality to spur them to lighten up — but still, he’s more depressing than I can stand. And the scene in Tess of the D’Urbervilles, where she slips a letter under Angel’s door and it goes under the rug so he never even sees it, but she never checks to see if he got it and her life is destroyed as a result, changed my life. If I send a message to someone over a a life-changing issue, I make sure they received it to ensure that I’m interpreting their silent treatment correctly.
The video below is from The Onion, which has just caught up with the idea that a man who must have his every remark scripted and scrolled across a TelePrompter screen is neither eloquent nor exceptionally bright. Remember, Obama is talented at getting smart people to do his homework and give him the credit. This is not the same as being intelligent himself:
How kind of dear Moe Lane, whose blog fu I admire and study every day, to link me today and say he ought to do it more! I rejoice at the prospect! And, in the spirit of full disclosure, covet the traffic, which I shall reciprocate to the best of my ability! (New gentle readers: I seldom use sarcasm, so please be aware, these lines come straight from my heart and are 100 percent sincere.) I also share his resolve to link more to dear Little Miss Attila and The Anchoress.
However, I have some contrary insight to add to Moe’s post about second-hand smoke being used by Apple as an excuse not to honor AppleCare warranties. Bear in mind that I have been a raving fan of Macs since my first Fat Mac (the 512K), purchased in Nov. 1984. I use both the PC and Mac operating systems now, but I love Apple and Macintosh computers with a passion that I do not feel for anything PC.
So those are my bona fides.
I see the point of poking Apple about nanny corporatism and smoking.
However, I was born to a mother who smoked and I live now in a house that she filled with cigarette smoke from December 1964 until January 2006, that is, until she fell and broke her shoulder and I told her that, as a blind person with the use of only one arm and over 100 cigarette burns on the rug in front of her spot on the sofa in the den, she had just stopped smoking. Mother died April 23, 2006.
Right after Mother’s death, I got help and scrubbed down the ceilings, walls, floors and windows throughout the house to get rid of the nicotine film on everything — including light fixtures and light bulbs. We wore kitchen gloves because nicotine is a poison and is easily absorbable transcutaneously — that particular property made it a cause of death in an episode of “The Closer” with Kyra Sedgwick.
Since then I’ve scrubbed down the walls, floor, ceiling, light fixtures and light bulbs of the family bath in our home twice and it needs a third scrubbing now because the walls are dripping with brown nicotine goo again — almost four years after the cessation of smoking in the house due to Mother’s death.
So — while I think Apple Computer should honor the AppleCare warranties of cigarette smokers whose smoking has fouled various computer parts with that sticky brown nicotine film, since their techs can make the repairs while wearing exam gloves (the kind used in healthcare settings), because nicotine is a transcutaneous poison and is only a little less efficient at gumming up computers than SuperGlue vapors, I do think Apple has solid justifications for declining to do so. It’s not a nanny state issue when they are protecting their employees.
Remember that I wrote about the colorful abstract print dress included above because she chose that cheerful pattern over her signature funeral director color palette from the Malcolm X line of designer Louis Farrakhan, which she usually favors, to wear to the ceremony to award a posthumous Medal of Honor and present it to the slain soldier’s family.