Sassy Gay Friend tells gay kids to stick around despite anti-gay bullies because it gets better

by CynthiaYockey on October 10, 2010

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genes October 11, 2010 at 3:42 pm

Good advice for anyone who’s different.

Janis October 11, 2010 at 9:53 pm

Gawd, high school sucks rocks for ANYONE who is in any way an individual of any kind whatsoever. Gay kids — PLEASE DON’T OFF YOURSELVES. Trust me, all those people who are making your life miserable will have the most meaningless, worthless lives imaginable. Believe me. Stick around so you can go to your high school reunion with a good career and a great life and go laugh at them while they drink like fish and reminisce about the only times in their lives when they were on top of the heap.

Some people peak a little early. Gay-hating bullies in high school are routinely those people. Stick around so when you’re 40 you can be proud of how petty you aren’t for gloating. 🙂

Peter October 12, 2010 at 10:36 pm

Well, at my age none of my friends can be called sassy, we are more in the lines of curmudgeons. You will pardon me for saying that a gay kid should make friends with at least one “tough guy”. Like help Moose, the right tackle from the football team with his homework on whatever subject the gay kid is good at. Of course, I’m old and my big outing for the week is a visit to WalMart. When I was younger there were gay “muscle queens”. I’m sure that wording is considered passe’ now and I hope my ( mostly electronic) gay and lesbian friends will forgive me for the wording, I also know folks will know what I mean. Anyhow, one of those MQs, by whatever they’re known as now, besides people (my preferred word) would be handy for the same reason that police departments like great big guys on the streets. There is something calming about a twenty-one inch bicep.

And, yes, things get better. I live so far out in the country they have to ship daylight in via FedEx. Yet lesbian women walk through the supermarket with their arms ’round each other and nobody gives a damn. We don’t have a gay community out here, we have people who share housing. The more flamboyant types would prefer the larger cities, Houston and Dallas, along with Austin have vibrant communities where darned near anything goes. The message is simple. Hang in long enough and any kid can find his or her place where (s)he is a part of instead of apart from. Heck, me being here proves that.

CynthiaYockey October 13, 2010 at 11:48 am

Janis and Peter,

Thank you for your comments. I had too much to say to make a short post and I’m still sick and in pain and couldn’t properly organize my thoughts for a longer one, but you two have done the job.

Peter, the stereotype for gay men is more accurate when it is hyper-masculine rather than effeminate. I remember a comedian on Comedy Central remarking that he wants his son to grow up to be very masculine and he had surrendered to the fact that he was going to have to point to gay men as models for that. And recently during a flurry of posts on DADT, one of the milbloggers who supports the repeal of DADT said that if he were wounded, he’d be praying that the medic who came to carry him to safety was a gay man because he could count on a gay man to be very muscular and fit and able to carry him to safety.


Peter October 14, 2010 at 3:02 am

We had a Doc who was teh ghey. Back then few units did well with overtly gay troops, which is why i hesitate with ending DADT. I do not place blame, it’s just the way it was back then. Now? I dunno. The Doc was a valued member of our unit before anyone knew about his preferences. Since he, to the best of anyone’s knowledge, never laid down with a serviceman, it wasn’t an issue. He left a leg over ‘cross the pond. He tied a tourniquet above where it was mangled and kept working on a wounded marine. Saved him, too. This particular man had big brass ones that clanged when he walked.

Back then, though, too many others tried to prey on the younger Marines and Sailors. And too many straight servicemen would attack anyone perceived as gay. Today? I dunno. Since DADT is on it’s way out, I pray the new system, whatever it is, works. We have troubles enough with an unknown, but significant percentage of the world’s billion and a half Muslims that want to kill you and enslave my grandchildren without effing up the military.

CynthiaYockey October 21, 2010 at 11:38 pm


Removing the necessity for secrecy and the opportunity for blackmail will have a wholesome effect. As for predators, female service members have to cope with that now, so predation is not a characteristic unique to gays.

I remain mystified as to why the armed services can order service members to pound sand about serving with Muslims who are religiously required to kill all unbelievers or force them into servitude, but then they go all wobbly about enforcing an orderly transition to equality for lesbians and gays.


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