UPDATED — I'm a Wolverine, so I just can't pass this up

by CynthiaYockey on March 16, 2010

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Note to gentle readers who do not follow college sports: The University of Michigan (Go Blue! Hail to the victors valiant!) and Ohio State University (Hiss! Boo!) are rivals. Oh, and the mascot for the University of Michigan is the wolverine, one of Nature’s fiercest predators. The mascot for Ohio State is — I am not making this up — a nut.

Update, 3/17/2010, Wed.:

Poor I R A Darth Aggie can’t remember the words to the Michigan Fight Song! Let me help:

I only recall hearing people sing the refrain of “The Victors”:

Hail! to the victors valiant
Hail! to the conqu’ring heroes
Hail! Hail! to Michigan
The leaders and best!
Hail! to the victors valiant
Hail! to the conqu’ring heroes
Hail! Hail! to Michigan,
The champions of the West!

Wikipedia has the history of the University of Michigan fight song and all the lyrics. I searched and couldn’t find any video of any group singing the entire song. Wikipedia’s entry notes that Michigan’s fight song is unique because it’s the only one glorifying the team as already victorious — all the others just urge their teams on. I think one day research will show that’s the way to go about achieving a goal — if you can create and maintain a clear image of what it would be when you have achieved it, then your brain will be able to invent, create, attract and unite everything required to make the imaginary image a reality. The book I advertise here goes into how to do this in great detail. While it is named, How to Get Lots of Money for Anything — Fast, it also explains how to use these techniques to get your perfect job and find the spouse or business partner who is just right for you. I was using similar techniques unwittingly when I attracted Margaret into my life, even though at the time I started, we lived over 900 miles apart and I was unemployed. Seriously, y’all, BUY. THAT. BOOK. (I do receive an affiliate commission if you purchase it, but I am recommending it because Stuart is giving very solid advice.)

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  • I R A Darth Aggie

    Ah, Michigan…

    Fail! Fail! We Missed-Again!

    Fail! To the second-rate finishers!
    Fail! The return diminishers!
    Fail! Fail! To Michigan!
    We always flunk the test!

    Fail! But remember our cheer:
    Fail! But just WAIT ‘TIL NEXT YEAR!
    Fail! Fail! We Missed-Again!
    Forever second best!

    Another:

    Help! Help! For Michigan!

    Help! For the big game losers!
    Help! For the choke excusers!
    Help! Help! For Michigan,
    Aid is needed here!

    Help! For the behind-laggers!
    Help! The MNC gaggers!
    Help! Help! For Michigan,
    But WAIT UNTIL NEXT YEAR!

    My favorite:

    Hurl! Hurl! To Sing Again!

    Hurl! To this wretched fight song!
    Hurl! While the hounds bark along!
    Hurl! Hurl! This fight song sucks!
    Vomit and spew!

    Hurl! At this putrid show tune!
    Hurl! May the song please end soon!
    Hurl! Hurl! Our fight song sucks!
    We barf in Maize and Blue!

    From back in the days before overtime, and coaches would settle for
    the tie:

    Tie! Tie! With Sissy-men!

    Tie! With the non-deciders!
    Tie! With the draw abiders!
    Tie! Tie! With Sissy-men!
    Chokers and goats!

    Tie! With the even-Stephens!
    Tie! With the no-win heathens!
    Tie! Tie! With Sissy-men!
    Grasping at their throats!

  • Jeffrey Quick

    I’m a Michigan grad who is an economic refugee in Ohio, and that first pic is a stitch!

    And joy is playing the first strain of The Victors at full speed in a tuba-euphonium ensemble.

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