Comments on: I remember you — in memory of Margaret Ardussi http://aconservativelesbian.com/2009/12/07/i-remember-you-in-memory-of-margaret-ardussi/ A Conservative Lesbian Wed, 08 Feb 2012 15:58:37 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.2.1 By: I am a finalist for Grande Conservative Blogress at Gay Patriot — voting has started — Cynthia Yockey, A Conservative Lesbian http://aconservativelesbian.com/2009/12/07/i-remember-you-in-memory-of-margaret-ardussi/#comment-2430 I am a finalist for Grande Conservative Blogress at Gay Patriot — voting has started — Cynthia Yockey, A Conservative Lesbian Thu, 24 Dec 2009 00:26:18 +0000 http://www.aconservativelesbian.com/?p=2323#comment-2430 [...] “I remember you“: I’m providing this link from the fifth anniversary of Margaret’s death for the comments more than the post itself. [...] [...] “I remember you“: I’m providing this link from the fifth anniversary of Margaret’s death for the comments more than the post itself. [...]

]]> By: Cynthia Yockey http://aconservativelesbian.com/2009/12/07/i-remember-you-in-memory-of-margaret-ardussi/#comment-2429 Cynthia Yockey Tue, 15 Dec 2009 23:54:36 +0000 http://www.aconservativelesbian.com/?p=2323#comment-2429 Prosehack65, It was the worst pain of my life to lose Margaret, even though her death was expected and I was able to make her experience as free of pain and fear and filled with love as it is possible to be. However, your loss is entirely different. I hope you are working with a bereavement counselor and a support group for people who have survived a loved one's suicide. Because your life partner left you under circumstances that were traumatizing, you may benefit as well from working with the concepts of forgiveness and release. I particularly like the works of the Unity minister, Catherine Ponder, on this subject -- she has excellent advice on this subject (try <em>The Dynamic Laws of Prosperity</em> or <em>Pray and Grow Rich</em>). Forgiveness is the process of clearing the hurt, anger and resentment that connect you to someone who hurt you, or whom you have hurt. The purpose of forgiveness is to be free of those toxic emotions AND the connection to the person who inspired them. The Stuart Lichtman book I advertise after each post also has a process that could be very helpful (I receive an affiliate commission if you buy it through my link, but the reason I advertise it is that I like the book). I am not a counselor or therapist -- I am just making some suggestions that I hope will help you find your way to the professionals who can do you the most good. I wish you all the best. Cynthia Prosehack65,

It was the worst pain of my life to lose Margaret, even though her death was expected and I was able to make her experience as free of pain and fear and filled with love as it is possible to be.

However, your loss is entirely different. I hope you are working with a bereavement counselor and a support group for people who have survived a loved one’s suicide.

Because your life partner left you under circumstances that were traumatizing, you may benefit as well from working with the concepts of forgiveness and release. I particularly like the works of the Unity minister, Catherine Ponder, on this subject — she has excellent advice on this subject (try The Dynamic Laws of Prosperity or Pray and Grow Rich). Forgiveness is the process of clearing the hurt, anger and resentment that connect you to someone who hurt you, or whom you have hurt. The purpose of forgiveness is to be free of those toxic emotions AND the connection to the person who inspired them.

The Stuart Lichtman book I advertise after each post also has a process that could be very helpful (I receive an affiliate commission if you buy it through my link, but the reason I advertise it is that I like the book).

I am not a counselor or therapist — I am just making some suggestions that I hope will help you find your way to the professionals who can do you the most good. I wish you all the best.

Cynthia

]]> By: Prosehack65 http://aconservativelesbian.com/2009/12/07/i-remember-you-in-memory-of-margaret-ardussi/#comment-2428 Prosehack65 Tue, 15 Dec 2009 22:04:58 +0000 http://www.aconservativelesbian.com/?p=2323#comment-2428 I stumbled here by accident--but was apparently meant to. Your devotion to your partner "in sickness and in health," is--well, it is as it should be. That's what we do for people we love. I know it wasn't all sunshine and unicorns, but the important thing is the vow, whether state-sanctioned or no. My partner of 5 years suffered from bi-polar disorder, and we spent much of our relationship dealing with those issues. She shot herself, in front of me, this February. This is my first holiday without her. I'm not sure how I'm going to do this. I can't imagine how you did. I stumbled here by accident–but was apparently meant to.

Your devotion to your partner “in sickness and in health,” is–well, it is as it should be. That’s what we do for people we love. I know it wasn’t all sunshine and unicorns, but the important thing is the vow, whether state-sanctioned or no.

My partner of 5 years suffered from bi-polar disorder, and we spent much of our relationship dealing with those issues.

She shot herself, in front of me, this February. This is my first holiday without her.

I’m not sure how I’m going to do this. I can’t imagine how you did.

]]> By: Cynthia Yockey http://aconservativelesbian.com/2009/12/07/i-remember-you-in-memory-of-margaret-ardussi/#comment-2427 Cynthia Yockey Thu, 10 Dec 2009 04:52:58 +0000 http://www.aconservativelesbian.com/?p=2323#comment-2427 Thank you all for your condolences, which truly consoled me and warmed my heart! I am grateful to have such loving gentle readers! Thank you, thank you, thank you! Cynthia Thank you all for your condolences, which truly consoled me and warmed my heart!

I am grateful to have such loving gentle readers! Thank you, thank you, thank you!

Cynthia

]]> By: Dr. sipmac http://aconservativelesbian.com/2009/12/07/i-remember-you-in-memory-of-margaret-ardussi/#comment-2426 Dr. sipmac Thu, 10 Dec 2009 04:27:43 +0000 http://www.aconservativelesbian.com/?p=2323#comment-2426 Dear Cynthia, your true love never leaves, you can feel that presence in every corner, and every word and every memory are staying with you, not for long as you live but forever. In these circumstances I am always fighting to find the exact words to express from my personal exprience what I think and feel, but this time I'm sure you know this a lot better than me. Sorry for your loss. .-= Dr. sipmac´s last blog ..<a href="http://sipmac.blogspot.com/2009/12/soap-opera-values-lurking-in-real-world.html" rel="nofollow">Soap Opera values lurking in the real world</a> =-. Dear Cynthia, your true love never leaves, you can feel that presence in every corner, and every word and every memory are staying with you, not for long as you live but forever.

In these circumstances I am always fighting to find the exact words to express from my personal exprience what I think and feel, but this time I’m sure you know this a lot better than me. Sorry for your loss.
.-= Dr. sipmac´s last blog ..Soap Opera values lurking in the real world =-.

]]> By: Richard McEnroe http://aconservativelesbian.com/2009/12/07/i-remember-you-in-memory-of-margaret-ardussi/#comment-2425 Richard McEnroe Thu, 10 Dec 2009 01:11:46 +0000 http://www.aconservativelesbian.com/?p=2323#comment-2425 Just dropping a note to see how you're doing... http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_j24uCNMZoG8/Sx_nEXf9_iI/AAAAAAAAKMU/-zmO7mAPCSs/s400/kitten-hug.jpg .-= Richard McEnroe´s last blog ..<a href="http://threebeerslater.blogspot.com/2009/12/is-snopescom-astroturf.html" rel="nofollow">Is Snopes.com Astroturf?</a> =-. Just dropping a note to see how you’re doing…

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_j24uCNMZoG8/Sx_nEXf9_iI/AAAAAAAAKMU/-zmO7mAPCSs/s400/kitten-hug.jpg
.-= Richard McEnroe´s last blog ..Is Snopes.com Astroturf? =-.

]]> By: Cassandra http://aconservativelesbian.com/2009/12/07/i-remember-you-in-memory-of-margaret-ardussi/#comment-2424 Cassandra Wed, 09 Dec 2009 15:36:47 +0000 http://www.aconservativelesbian.com/?p=2323#comment-2424 <i>I have shed a tear for your loss and uttered a prayer for you Cynthia, that in time, your sorrow will diminish and the memories of your joyous life together with Margaret will increase a thousand-fold.</i> Amen. I have shed a tear for your loss and uttered a prayer for you Cynthia, that in time, your sorrow will diminish and the memories of your joyous life together with Margaret will increase a thousand-fold.

Amen.

]]> By: Yu-Ain Gonnano http://aconservativelesbian.com/2009/12/07/i-remember-you-in-memory-of-margaret-ardussi/#comment-2423 Yu-Ain Gonnano Wed, 09 Dec 2009 15:04:56 +0000 http://www.aconservativelesbian.com/?p=2323#comment-2423 My deepest sympathies, Cynthia. My deepest sympathies, Cynthia.

]]> By: BillT http://aconservativelesbian.com/2009/12/07/i-remember-you-in-memory-of-margaret-ardussi/#comment-2422 BillT Wed, 09 Dec 2009 11:00:21 +0000 http://www.aconservativelesbian.com/?p=2323#comment-2422 Carve your gladness in stone, but write your sorrows in the sand... .-= BillT´s last blog ..<a href="http://www.thedonovan.com/archives/2009/12/its_de_facto.html" rel="nofollow">It's De Facto</a> =-. Carve your gladness in stone, but write your sorrows in the sand…
.-= BillT´s last blog ..It’s De Facto =-.

]]> By: Joe http://aconservativelesbian.com/2009/12/07/i-remember-you-in-memory-of-margaret-ardussi/#comment-2421 Joe Wed, 09 Dec 2009 06:44:49 +0000 http://www.aconservativelesbian.com/?p=2323#comment-2421 I am sorry for your loss. I am sorry for your loss.

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